elder.org

Deciding between a care home or 24/7 live in carer Hi everyone, my 95 year old grandmother is showing signs of needing full-time care, or at least domiciliary care. Currently my 94 year old grandfather looks after her by helping her to wash/dress, bringing her food etc, but it's understandably getting a bit much for him. He's still mobile, and there are no signs of dementia or anything at all. They've always been independent, since I was a child, and though they've both had heart trouble (my grandmother has a pacemaker) they have remained relatively healthy. My grandmother is still able to talk to us - we visit frequently - especially about ballet which has been a longtime passion of hers, or films she likes, but she does get forgetful and starts randomly talking about something from years ago that nobody mentioned. She can still get up and walk to the toilet, but for the most part she stays in bed. This has been happening since about March - before that she was more mobile and able to come downstairs, now she can't really manage it :( My grandfather has requested that we look into possible care homes for her, however, I think she would be happier with live-in care so that she can stay in her home. However, my grandfather is reluctant for a 'stranger' to come into their home and live with them, so he wants us to look into care homes, though I've explained that the carer would be someone matched to them, as [https://www.elder.org/](https://www.elder.org/) offers. My parents called an adult social care number, and they visited my grandparents, but just provided numbers for cleaners and information about a stairlift. They might need more care than just 3 visits a week also. We're looking into arranging a respite week at a care home, to see how it goes for my grandma and also to give my grandpa a break, but I feel that my grandma would prefer to remain in her home. We have no idea how to tell her about this, since it is a little hard to hold a conversation with her a